Zane, I am a big fan and I saw on your Facebook page that you give advice to those in need. I am a recently married 24 year old and I am having second thoughts. My husband and I have been together for almost 5 years. We just got married in March with our family and friends but legally in May. Everything was going well until recently. Weve had our share of problems but I thought we worked them out. He continuously brings up my past and thinks Im always cheating on him. I never try to bring up his past and how he used to put his hands on me because he asked me not too. I recently got a promotion at work so now he thinks he doesnt have to work anymore. We live in DC so one income isnt enough especially since we have a 2year old child. I told him to quit his part time job back before our wedding because it was costing more to get back and forth to work than he was making and I couldnt afford it. Ever since then I feel like his drive to do better has diminished. He recently got a job but only stayed there for two days because he lied and told them we were going out of town (which we didnt). He has been cancelling interviews saying they are to far away. I feel like he just doesnt want to work. Am I wrong for wanting to end it all because I dont want to live my life taking care of a grown man? Was I wrong for telling him to quit his job? I work hard for my money and my promotion so I dont understand why he thinks he doesnt have to. I know they say men take longer to grow up but when you turned 27, I thought that was pretty grown? I just dont know what to say or do anymore because Im way over a continuous conversation. Please help! Signed, Confused & Unhappy Newlywed MY RESPONSE: You need to follow your gut instincts and end the marriage. I know someone who did not follow hers around that same age and in the same situation and she is now in her 50s with four kids and a husband who has never worked for more than 3% of their entire marriage. You should not be feeding him, clothing him or putting a roof other his head PERIOD. He is taking away from the things you can do for HIS CHILD. And no real man would be cool with that. Good luck.
Posted on: Sun, 13 Jul 2014 12:49:24 +0000
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