am vile in my imaginations: O what scum rises to the surface when lusts boil within me. What filthy pictures are visioned in “the chambers of my imagery” (Ezekiel 8:12). What unlawful desires run riot within. Yes, even when engaged in meditating upon the holy things of God, the mind wanders and the fancy becomes engaged with what is foul and fetid. How often does the writer have to acknowledge before God that “from the sole of the foot even unto the head there is no soundness” in him, “but wounds and bruises and putrefying sores” (Isaiah 1:6). Nightly does he avail himself of that Fountain which has been opened “for sin and for uncleanness” (Zechariah 13:1). 2.) I am vile in my self-will: How fretful am I when God blows upon my plans and thwarts my desires. What surgings of rebellion within my wicked breast when God’s providences displease. Instead of lying placidly as clay in the Potter’s hand, how often do I act like the restive colt, which rears and kicks, refusing to be held in with bit and bridle, determined to have my own way. Alas, alas, how very little have I learned of Him who was “meek and lowly in heart.” Instead of “the flesh” in me being purified, it has putrefied; instead of its resistance to the spirit weakening, it appears to be stronger each year. O that I had the wings of a dove, that I could fly away from myself. 3.) I am vile in my religious pretenses: How often I am anxious to make “a fair show in the flesh” and be thought highly of by others. What hypocrisies have I been guilty of in seeking to gain a reputation for spirituality. How frequently have I conveyed false impressions to others, making them suppose it was far otherwise within me than was actually the case. What pride and self-righteousness have swayed me. And of what insincerity have I, at times, been guilty of in the pulpit: praying to the ears of the congregation instead of to God, pretending to have liberty when my own spirit was bound, speaking of those things which I had not first felt and handled for myself. Much, very much cause has the writer to take the leper’s place, cover his lips, and cry “Unclean, unclean!” 4.) I am vile in my unbelief: How often am I still filled with doubts and misgivings. How often do I lean unto my own understanding instead of upon the Lord. How often do I fail to expect from God (Mark 11:24) the things for which I ask Him. When the hour of testing comes, only too frequently are past deliverances forgotten. When troubles assail, instead of looking off unto the things unseen, I am occupied with the difficulties before me. Instead of remembering that with God all things are possible, I am ready to say, “Can God furnish a table in the wilderness?” (Psalm 78:19). True it is not always thus, for the Holy Spirit graciously keeps alive the faith which He has placed within; but when He ceases to work, and a trial is faced, how often do I give my Master occasion to say, “How is it that ye have no faith?” (Mark 4:40). Reader, how closely does your experience correspond with the above? Is it true that, “As in water face answereth to face, so the heart of man to man” (Proverbs 27:19)? Have we been describing some of the symptoms of your diseased heart? Have you ever owned before God “Behold, I am vile”? Do you bear witness to the humbling fact before your brethren and sisters in Christ? It is comparatively easy to utter such words, but do you feel them? Does the realization of this truth make you “blush” (Ezra 9:6) and groan in secret? Have you such a person and painful sense of your vileness that often, you feel thoroughly unfit to draw nigh unto a holy God?” —A. W. Pink (1886–1952) Taken from “The Life of David, Volume 1” by A. W. Pink (
Posted on: Wed, 03 Jul 2013 01:09:03 +0000
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