expectations are pre-meditative resentments I grew up in a household with loads of expectations. An expectation to do well in school, to do the right thing, to look perfect. These expectations were strong and pervasive growing up. Looking back, I fit the bill of a pretty normal childhood. I got the good grades, but I never really tried or learned discipline. I pretended to do the right thing, even though I lied about almost everything I did or didnt do. And on the outside, I made the appearance of a happy child. I looked good, but on the inside was going through a living hell. The expectations were keeping me locked in the prison walls of what I should be doing, instead of living in a land of possibility. This family pattern was passed on generation after generation. No fault to anyone, just an endless cycle of fear based reality. And this stops with me. I refuse to allow this kind of reality to rule my life. After a long introspective inner journey, I realize that I have been living in a world of expectations and disappointment. Yes, the two go hand in hand. Expectation is a pre-meditated resentment. I am no longer interested in holding people hostage to my expectations. Or living in a place of constant control and perfectionism. How do I break free from this? Let go of control. How do I let go of control? breathe. What if breathing isnt doing it for me (fast enough)... (Message from myself to me) Sweetheart, you are doing fine. Its a good thing that you are starting to notice the expectations you put on others and yourself. SLOW DOWN. Control, is a form a fear...and that is why you have needed expectations. To stay in control. Its ok to let go, to relax and to allow....in the allowance, miracles occur. In the relaxation, creativity blossoms. In the letting go, you will find exactly what you are looking for. No expectations needed. No prison walls to hold. You get to be free. When you are free, others will feel free to be themselves, and I promise...this is the ground where miracles can grow. Be patient with yourself. You are doing good work. You will help others with this same issue. This is part of the gift of the family pattern. Do not judge it or them for partaking. Its important for you to be free of judgement...be free within yourself...be free with others. You are safe, and loved for being exactly who you are...with messy hair and all. New rule: No expectations.
Posted on: Mon, 19 May 2014 16:08:34 +0000