in her quest to lose weight my mom tried some wild shit. First up: the magic outfit. It was blue and smelled like a new swimming pool liner. she rolled it onto her body with a lot of under her breath cursing. then she hooked it to the vacuum and inflated this thing. so, here she is like a little blue michelin man and going ssh, shh, pwhip, pwhip as she walks (waddles) about. of course her children follow her making the same sounds because what sweet girls they are. she tries to do her normal routine because that is what the bullshit thing tells her to do. she cant really lift her arms up very far and running or even moving beyond a zippy waddle is out of the question. the goal of the thing is to make you sweat the pounds off without effort.... and she is sweating but there is another thing, something no one mentioned. she has to pee and she has to pee now. apparently this dog awful thing is causing her bladder to work overtime and hey, as much of a struggle as it was to put on it is ten times worse in reverse. she is stuck. hopeless she goes out in the yard, pisses in the suit and then hoses it off. we eventually get her peeled back out. she hangs it to dry. she wears it another time or two until eventually she sits down on metal and it melts on her butt. i wish i could say this was the only stupid contraption. it was not.
Posted on: Sun, 11 Jan 2015 03:48:25 +0000
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