in sincere retrospect of myself, i find that i am contradictory to my own values which i hold such as things like i dont care about your gender. i hate everyone equally. because, when i look back, i actually have been more vocal and ferocious to many a troll, keyboard warrior, intellectually bigoted/challenged, if that person was male. for the females, i tend to hold back. i ask myself why, and then it hit me pretty hard. for someone who says i dont really care what people think, actually i did care. i cared that if i tried to pick a fight with (as my boss liked to put it) a weak defenseless female, then i might be looked at as an asshole. and because of this fear, ive actually violated my own ideals, that i should not discriminate when criticizing others, and thus did not hold everyones ideas to equal scrutiny. yes, ive always called out people for being a mangina, but turns out i havent defeated the mangina in myself. so whats my problem? is it because i thirst for pussy? nope, there are brothels for that. maybe its because i still feel that primal need for validation from females. the instinctual habit of not being able to form my own self-value system instead of always needing a mother to tell me how strong i am as a man. yeah. i guess im not that special after all.
Posted on: Sat, 06 Dec 2014 08:56:46 +0000