//no one talks to me any more... not even my main is online much now... granted their computer is being a butt.... but still.... I am pretty sad and lonely.... :/ guess I go back to crocheting entire scarves every night..... Better to make scarves than to disappoint or scare my mother and brother and muse about if Ill start cutting again.... Dont worry guys... Ive got yarn instead of a blade tonight... I got dis.... I hope... Im trying to do better to cope on my own.. maybe this silence is good... a step back... collect myself... stop trying to help others when I am letting myself fall apart.... I need to find my inner strength again... I know its in there somewhere.... I think... Just gotta find the courage to be happy and confident in myself again.... I think... I just... focused on other people so much so I didnt have to see or feel how much I was falling apart again... I HAD been happy, I HAD been better... I hadnt been depressed in so so long... then it crept up on me... and here I am again... Guess I was just too busy making other people feel better so they would never feel like I feel, so they wouldnt lay broken like I have... so they wouldnt be alone like I was..... Either way, now I gotta remember how I dug myself out last time... guess crocheting is a start..... wish me luck.... *hugs and kisses*
Posted on: Thu, 11 Dec 2014 06:06:41 +0000
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