ok, For the couple of folks out there who have followed My Story .. I have another chapter to add , and then a question at the end.. The Costellos in Japan. Summary of last chapter: My husband Marty went to Japan as a jet pilot in the Marine Corps. I had our daughter Jill, with my mother in attendance, but Marty had to stay in Japan. “If the Marine Corps wanted you to have a wife, they would have issued you one”, was a running joke. We were allowed a 2 month visit in Japan, if we could get there. I elected to bring our 6 month old daughter Jill, and our son Adam, now 4 with me . The trip was a small plane, then a bigger plane , then the biggest plane.. many hours, with only a glimpse of Hawaii from a window. JAPAN We landed in Tokyo. And I remember waiting to get through customs, and searching faces to see Marty. I had not seen him for 9 months. He was there, grin from ear to ear, with a single rose. Had I even considered jet lag? NO. Did I realize how tired I would be. NO. Did I even imagine what a city like Tokyo would be like? Never. Besides not sleeping well, or doing “anything else” well, I was worrying about baby food, and Pampers and supplies for a 6 month old.. IWAKUNI Tokyo was a metropolis. modern and bustling. Very crowded. People were smiling and friendly. All I wanted to know was is there food for my baby ,and diapers, etc. Should we buy as much as we could to take to the small town we would go to , where Marty was based, Iwakuni. I have not done any research for this essay. I was so focused on my children, and Marty, I can not remember what I may have known about location of Iwakuni or much else about it. I am a person who feels more than I analyze. I can analyze but it must be something I truly focus on.. ie my current house remodel, or my horses, and the foals. Then , it was my children, and reuniting with the love of my life.. Marty. I was pretty dependent on the relationship.. having really not had a lot of time on my own .. first High School, then College, then Marriage. That dependency did eventually change , thank goodness, but it was a while later on.. Anyway, The base was simple but as bases went, it had everything,. The mess hall, the commissary(grocery et al)``, the childcare center, medical facility, airstrip of course. etc. Immediately we had to rush and find placer to stay together, Marty moving off base for our visit. But finding a place that even resembled what I know in the US was hard. Rooms wer divided by screens, and I wanted an American style toilet! And there were no cribs to be found, luckily we bought or rented a playpen for starters. Then we still had to learn to be a family again. I had begun to make decisions on my own, and now Marty was back as head of household. And he didn’t know the kids so well…. Or I should say, he knew Adam but Adam had grown up more, and he really didn’t know Jill.. The cutie who still would not sleep well at night, and who was easily distracted .. and now didn’t want me to feed her any food.. she wanted to do it her self. She was only 6 months old! She became known at the Childcare center as the baby who fed herself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich , broken up in tiny pieces so she could pick it up and put into her mouth! She ate veggies that way, but fewer, and she ate cheerios, and banana pieces etc..but if anyone would put something on a spoon , or a fork, she would literally push it away, shake her head “NO”.. and life would be hard! I am sure ,part of this was that she had had a tired , single mom and I wanted to hug her, not have fusses. Marty still had a work schedule, he didn’t get time off just because his family came to visit. He still had to fly and and so on. So our Japan visit was a bit of a roller coaster. some high highs, and still some lows. He had to sleep. Tell that to a crying baby. In between some of the difficulties, what fun. We would pour ourselves into a tiny car, that one only saw then in Japan, and travelled to Hiroshima and amusement parks in the mountains, and take boat rides on very scenic waterways, .. eat some very unusual foods, and meet some lovely people who only wanted to stare at my blue –eyed son, and tickle my darling tiny daughter.. (their children would look so much bigger than Jill at that age) .. WE shopped in busy markets, and Marty and I did get off to some romantic getaways on beaches.. and drove on winding roads up steep slopes. My children seemed to be able to enjoy Japanese cartoons even though they did not understand the language.. and Adam learned some Japanese language and really seemed to fit into the groups of children we would find during our travels. We have some lovely pictures of him and friends. One of our fun times was climbing a steep path into a mountain where wild deer would come up to you and be petted. Another time was when Adam was overwhelmed by dozens of pigeons flying all around him and a nice Japanese man could catch them and hand them to Adam to hold. I believe that that trip made a lasting impressions on our son. He has always had many friendships with Asians, He and Jill would enjoy our time in California later on, where there were many children of diverse backgrounds. Eventually he would go back to Japan for a course related to his studies in computer research , and he also took the Japanese language course. And he has married a Chinese woman. Marty had to go to Okinawa for a week or so. I stayed back. That was fun. Yes there were a couple of other wives there but generally, it was just wives and husbands, I had children. So I did what moms do all over the world, I fed, and bathed, and walked, and read stories and put to bed, and rocked at night, and repeated in the morning . I answered a million questions from my very inquisitive 4 year old, watched Japanese TV, and waited for Marty. We were 29 years old. Looking back, that explains an awful lot.. for me!! My son , Adam, was married at age 35 . ### I will try to write one more chapter 1975-Going HOME FROM JAPAN and MOVING Then I have to think about this question: How do people really feel about the books and memoirs and notes etc that people write which could expose experiences that will be different for the people written about? Is it always wrong to write about real life? It might hurt or make someone uncomfortable? IT might be interpreted differently. Yet look at all of the people who share and help others. What if it helps someone, as in when someone writes about overcoming illnesses or weaknesses? What if it makes someone feel less alone, since they know they went through it too? Some see it always as self serving? Some it is therapeutic, some say it is cruel. Must putting ideas into words, for others to experience be a negative? Is it better to put it into fictional story with a transparent storyline? There are many writers on FB , I wonder what they think? Thank you.
Posted on: Thu, 14 Nov 2013 01:37:11 +0000
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