ok so after reading so many post about the death of Robin Williams.... I cant bite my tongue any longer. Im seeing both sides of this posted... and will say KUDOS to those of you who are educated on depression and appear to understand it. For those of you that think depression is something you just snap out of or just need to get a better attitude , let me tell you something, I have battled this since I was 15. You have no idea the things that go through my head, in fact, I doubt you could last a day in my shoes. And before everyone jumps the gun, no Im not looney, I am my worse critic over and over and over. No one could ever be harder on myself that I am.... my mind can race so much that its hard to sort my thoughts... but mainly its like having this little voice in the back of your head telling you youre never good enough, or to stop fighting, or... whatever the case must be at that moment.... but it is a struggle to get through each day... and sometimes a good day is when you dont completely hate yourself. Now of course each person is different, but for someone in a deep state, its a living hell... so yes I understand why some feel no other course but suicide. Im not saying their right, but Ive been in those shoes. I attempted when I was 18 and ended up in a coma for several days. No I didnt want attention, I had every intention of succeeding, and there have been times in my life where at the end of the day, its a victory if I was still alive. Oh yes, I know, Amandas on her box again.... but I am passionate about everything I believe in... and frankly the judgmental crap makes me sick.... you that are so quick to judge are why those that have a hard enough time holding our heads up are kicked down a little lower... because we see the stares, we hear the talk... and even if thats not how you intend it... because of the state were in, thats the way it will be taken. We fight our own demons, we dont need a knight on a white horse, but we certainly dont need your judgement casted upon us. For those of you being so supportive, please continue.... you have no idea how encouraging and appreciated it is to read your post and it truly does make me feel less ashamed of what I have lived with. Which is what this society needs! For those of you that posted statements that were anything less than supportive, think of this.... I can bet you over half of your friends list is either effected by depression either themselves or by some close to them. So continue to type by all means I wonder how many friends youve hurt that just didnt speak up because most wont (thats a part of the depression you idiots) youre statements of theyre weak and taking the easy way out will only push them further down that very road. In fact Im stronger than you could ever imagine because I live breathe and fight this every single day and manage to continue on. Youre only adding to the problem. If youre gonna contribute something to society, let it be your compassion and not your judgement.
Posted on: Tue, 12 Aug 2014 23:35:32 +0000
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