“When the student is ready, the teacher appears.” – Buddist Proverb As usual, I go to the basketball court at 6:30am, jumping rope, shooting jumpers, and suicide sprinting. I’ve been doing this since January this year, when the temperature was barely above freezing and the sun hadn’t even risen yet on those cold winter mornings. During the summer time now, I am not the only one there. There are several Asian old ladies in their 50s or 60s who also show up every morning and shoot basketball. Every now and then I’d also see some young guys coming, maybe for several days, or even a week, but none as consistent as these old ladies. They come at different time, some earlier, some later, but you can count on them showing up. In fact, there are many days when they beat me to the court and I’d have to go practice on another court! While they are not ballers by any means, they’d keep shooting baskets, and make a fair number of them. Well, I was there early enough this morning to get my court. Since it was hot but still early, and inspired by a middle-aged fat belly man running shirtless, I also took off my shirt while doing my suicide sprint. Afterwards, as I was catching my breath, I was aware that the old lady who was shooting on the other basket hesitantly approached me. It seemed that she wanted to speak to me. “May I say you something to you?” she asked in perfect English, which was very unusual for an Asian woman her age in this Chinese-dominated neighborhood. I nodded, with hands on my knees, grasping for breath, and sweat dripping on the court. Of course I kept wondering what she had to say. My guess was either to complain that I wasn’t wearing a shirt, or that she was going to tell me to slow down before killing myself, given how hard I was running. (Hey, it isn’t called “suicide sprint” for no reason) She asked, “You want to be a good basketball player?” Well, yes and no. I am not training to make any teams, or to win any championship. About three years ago when I was sufficiently disgusted at my ballooning weight and my ever expanding waist line, I picked up playing basketball again. I realize that in order for me to stick to an exercise program, it must be fun, and to me, basketball is fun. Since then, I play regularly pick-up games on weekends, and while it is true that I would certainly like to perform well in my street games, the motivation to train hard is more about proving a point and setting an example. You see, my son is almost two years old now, and I’d really like to see in him growing up to be a committed individual who perseveres and strives to realize the dream that touches him deeply. He never wastes his energy blaming others or complaining about his own shortcomings, but always proactively seeks to overcome adversity and makes the most out of a difficult situation. If there is a wall to stop him from achieving, you can count on him to climb over it, crawl under it, get around it, or just bang through it with brute force. That is something I am dying to have, and this is what I wish to see in my son. Now of course I can’t make him, or I don’t even think it is something that can be taught, but as his father I can be an inspiration for him. If I expect him to be committed and persevere, I’d feel like a hypocrite if I do not hold myself to live up to that standard myself. That’s why I wake up early to practice every morning before going to work. My son is usually still sleeping when I go to practice. In fact, he sees me playing games but I don’t think he ever sees me practice. So how am I “showing” him? This is another lesson I’ve learned the hard way: you don’t show people by performing in front of them, you simply live it. Commitment is not something that I can flip a switch and then I can proclaim myself committed. Commitment for excellence is a continual process that I can only work at it day after day, year after year. Then hopefully one day, maybe my son will notice and think, “Hmmm, if daddy is doing it everyday, maybe it is actually fun? Maybe as he says, while tiring, it actually feels extraordinarily rewarding? I want to be like dad.” I don’t know when that day will come, maybe when he turns 4, or 8, 16, 32, or 64, or maybe even never. All I know is that I have to be prepared and live a life of commitment everyday. Of course I wasn’t going to digress into the details to this old lady whom I never spoken to before, and so I just nodded to her question whether I want to be a good basketball player. Even though she was old, short and skinny, I wonder if maybe she was a basketball player in her youth. After all, she is shooting basketball here every morning. “I used to play piano,” she said. “I was practicing for an hour everyday, and I was going nowhere. I just wasn’t good and felt stuck. Then I make a commitment to do 2 hours a day. I see big improvement. That motivates me to do 3 hours a day, and I am better than everyone else in the class. Now you need to do it slowly. You cannot just get there in one step. You need to slow down, be patient, and stay committed for 2 hours a day.” * * * Wow, I can’t believe it! This old lady is telling me about commitment – when I am the only person under forty to be there on the basketball court every morning at 6:30am?!?!! Are you kidding me? And can you see the absurdity of this scene? Imagine a 200-pound, 30-year-old shirtless man (I was going to say hunk for dramatic effect but I know better) on a basketball court standing next to an old lady twice his age, half his weight and whom he never met before, and for him to listen to her advice on how to be a better basketball player?!? Heck, I can’t even recall another time that I was shirtless and sucking air while being that close and having a conversation to a female other than my wife! But I wasn’t laughing. I actually have tremendous respect for this old lady. Out of nowhere she has the courage to approach a stranger like me and shares her wisdom. On the contrary, what a coward I was as a teenager to be totally tongue-tied and completely lost my ability to speak a single word when standing in front of the girl I had a crush on! This old lady’s feat is even more impressive especially when considering the fact that I was wearing a game face while sweating all over and desperately sucking air, I probably look more like a thug than your friendly car salesman wearing a big smile sucking up to you. Still, she cares enough to make the effort to come to tell me the secret of achievement, as she wasn’t aware that I might have my own version that is very similar to hers already. At the end of the day, there is just no substitute for hard work, commitment, dedication, while we also need to sprinkle some ounces of patience and faith in our endeavor. She is indeed telling me the way and the only way I know in how to accomplish anything. It’s a great reminder from someone her age. I respectfully acknowledged her, “Thank you for your advice” and continued my practice. When I was finally done, I put back on my shirt, and walked towards her side of the court where she was still shooting, and thanked her once again. That was when I learned that she was almost 80 years old even thought she looked more like 65 to me! She proudly told me that she need not take any prescription, but just coming to the park and shoot basket everyday to maintain her good health. Now to anyone who claims he or she is too old to exercise, I would like to use Madeline - as she called herself (although I am more comfortable with Mrs. Qiu) - as a prime example to stop your B.S. Stop using the excuse that you are too weak so you don’t exercise, when it is precisely because you don’t exercise enough that you are weak! Stop using the excuse that exercise hurts your muscle when it is precisely because you don’t exercise that you feel pain in your muscle! Stop using the excuse that you don’t have the energy to exercise, when it is precisely because you don’t exercise and your blood not flowing that you don’t feel the energy! Stop using the excuse that your body can’t take it when what you really lack is the heart and determination. As Mrs. Qiu said, go slow, be patient, but stay committed – if not two hours, then an hour, or 30 minutes, or 15, or 10, or even just 5! Just get your lazy butt outside! It isn’t a matter of you can’t afford the luxury to go exercise, but rather you can’t afford not to. * * * Oh, one last thing, Mrs. Qiu told me that she started late learning piano. I was thinking she meant “late” as in seven years old, but in fact she meant not seven, not seventeen, but seventy! “I started taking piano lesson after I was seventy,” she said, “After getting my children and grandchildren through college I finally decided to pursue this dream. I always want to learn how to play the piano.” Yes, you may as well add “Stop using the excuse that you are too old to learn” to the list! And I don’t just mean “learn”, but to have the commitment to put in three hours a day to master the subject, enough for her to be able to teach young children how to play! When I finally said good bye to Mrs. Qiu because I was getting late to work, I felt a kind of inexplicable excitement in my body, as if my blood was filled with some kind of power waiting to explode. With that vibrant burst of energy, I charged towards the rim, took off, and touched the rim – a height I wasn’t able to reach last time when I tried several weeks ago – and now it seems so easy. Sure, it isn’t a dunk, but don’t tell me I am too old to ball. It feels so good!!!!
Posted on: Sat, 10 Aug 2013 01:04:09 +0000
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