A LETTER TO THE PERSON THAT STOLE MY JIMMY BUFFETT RECORDS WHEN I WAS 16: Dear Thief, I hope you enjoy the items you stole from the interior of my Mazda B2000 pickup truck. I really enjoyed them myself for a long time until you came along. Of course, a music collection like the one you now own is hard to replace and I’m just glad you were able to steal mine so you don’t have to spend years adding to it like I did. I think you will really enjoy the Jimmy Buffett collection that you got. Did you know that it includes every album he has recorded to date? By the way, that Sony Discman CD player can skip sometimes but be patient with it. Also, the Swiss-Army knife you got from my glove box was the first pocketknife I ever owned, but don’t worry I wasn’t attached to it or anything. I also hope you enjoyed the speaker you stole and the amplifier that went with it. Neither of them worked very well but I guess in your haste to get away, you didn’t have time to test them out. Thanks again and I hope you enjoy everything! P.S. (written 30 years later) I hope you know that I became a cop later in life partly because of what you did to me. So if you think about it, every person that I ever arrested can thank you for that experience. By the way, I’m pretty sure I know who you are. Although it’s too late for me to do anything about what you did to me, rest assured, Karma has no statute of limitations and it looks like she dealt with you pretty good. Fins up! MH
Posted on: Thu, 20 Mar 2014 19:48:30 +0000
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