A year on from the Christmas apocalypse: Dear diary. It has been almost a full year now since I single-handedly defeated the great demon and leader of the zombie hordes Saint Nick, and I can rest safe in the knowledge that Christmas will be forever safe from his cold, dead clutches. In the past year I have learned what I can from the old, dusty relics left behind, the main being Satans sleigh. I have brushed up on my GCSE science and discovered its incredible power source to be a Black Hole Singularity Projector, able to bend all of time and space around it to move effortlessly, which is no doubt how he was able to terrorise every house on earth in a single night. The singularity projector, however, had unfortunately been damaged in last years battle, and taken some time to fix - a full year in fact. However, armed with nothing but the OCR GCSE Core Science Modules 2-4 textbook, I have managed to repair it to what I believe to be a working state. Eager to test my new creation, I jumped into the sleigh and switched it on. I was instantly lifted up, down, backward and forwards all at once, and shaken in the most terrible manner that I was nearly flung from the vehicle. The engine began squealing in the most terrible manner, and suddenly exploded with an enormous boom. By the time it settled, I was thoroughly afraid for my life. I took a look around, and was dumbfounded. I found myself to be in the middle of some sort of desert - sand as far as the eye could see. Clearly the engine had worked after all! I jumped from the sleigh. On the horizon I could see movement, a group of people, five or six - perhaps some travellers who could lend some assistance. As they grew nearer, I became struck by the unusual design of their clothes, like nothing I had seen before - old, dusty, and far from modern. Clearly, the singularity projector had taken me further than I could ever have imagined - through the fabric of time itself. They came within earshot, and I called to them. You there! I cried, and they turned to look. It was only then that I noticed the snarls on their faces, the decaying grimace they wore over yellowed, broken teeth. They noticed me, and advanced, lumbering across the sands, arms outstretched. Dismayed, I turned to run. This could only mean one thing. The zombies were back. IN TIME.
Posted on: Tue, 16 Dec 2014 17:42:06 +0000
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