I often talk about recovery as a slinky; stretched vertically in ascending coils. I see how people move through the stages of change, build momentum, are challenged by limiting beliefs, struggle, and recommit to push onwards. I like the metaphor because even if you are in the dip of the coil, you are still on the upward spiral. This week I have been playing with the metaphor of life as a winding staircase, ascending, of course. If we are wise, then we stop and ponder the next step when we are faced with fear or challenge or uncertainty. We don’t have to hurl ourselves bodily down the stairs when faced with indecision, or when the next step is a big one. We don’t have to trip and fall in a dramatic attempt to self-sabotage either. We are going up regardless, the choice is in the pace. What I have noticed about myself is that sometimes ascending, sometimes even just taking the next step or series of steps is really hard! Sometimes I face resistance. Sometimes fear. Sometimes I am so overwhelmed with uncertainty that I am paralyzed and unable to move forward at all. I saw in myself – albeit two practitioners pointed it out before the awareness came – that I was carrying the burden of grief from step to step. Greif that came with the belief that moving up meant loosing everything that had come with the previous step; loss of the dreams, loss of the relationships, loss of the stability of the familiar, etc. It didn’t matter that I was actually evolving and in process. In my mind, each step was like an amputation, a small death, and therefore very painful. (Here’s some of that all or nothing thinking.) In recognizing this, and attending to it by clearing the beliefs and reprogramming ones which better serve me, by recreating a foundation which is stable regardless of my ascension, by allowing and embracing certain relationships evolving with me, the progress has been lighter, effortless and fulfilling. By learning to detach in a healthy way, by learning to let go, by learning the importance in the goodbyes, I have learned how to move forward into the life of my deepest envisioning.
Posted on: Fri, 14 Jun 2013 14:51:41 +0000
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