Im shy. Always have been. (stop shaking your head, you may hurt yourself) Seriously though. Its true, although it may not seem like it. Im just a big fake. While looking through a old journal I was writing in from 2008 I came across this BHAG (Big Hairy Ass Goal).... I WANT TO TALK TO ANYONE, ANYWHERE, ANYTIME ABOUT ANYTHING (I can already see my sarcastic friends coming up with something really clever to say) Although that may seem like a silly goal, it made perfect sense to me. I was about to embark on building a business and knew that I needed to figure out how to talk to strangers often. This scared me. It would make me sick to my stomach. I would physically get ill. Now, I cheated a little because I was in management for many years and also taught classes for a couple of years. (Let me tell you... the physical pains I felt before every class was ridiculous) So it was not as if I could not speak and share something of value. I can talk... just ask some of my friends. :) But it still was a big fear. There were many times when I let my fear get the best of me and I would not leave the house. But I would force myself to get out and be present. Show my face. And open mouth and speak if I had an idea to share. Noone would ever think I had any fear when talking to me. I would hide it well and I pretty damn good about speaking with conviction, even back then. The truth is that once I get going..... Im just perfectly fine. In fact, sometimes I would tell on myself and tell folks my little secret (especially in my training classes). But they would call BULLSHIT. So much for being honest. Fast forward to today and I am still shy but not scared. I do still get nervous but fear is not a part of the equation anymore. I dont feel that gut-wrenching feeling much anymore. I may be shy, but I dont let it keep me from speaking and sharing my personality and all my dimensions. (kinda like 3D but better.. HDTeevee) I think I accomplished my BHAG!!! Ive had some conversations with some people I would not have had the confidence to speak with just a few years ago. The most beautiful thing is that many of these people that I was afraid of are now my circle of friends. Close friends. Thank you, _teevee_ PS Now I need a new BHAG. Hmmphmm..
Posted on: Thu, 14 Aug 2014 02:48:51 +0000
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