Just wrote this on a NMMI blog... had to share. My son Joshua Rice had been to Jr leadership camp two summers in a row before starting his first semester. He loved camp and was confident in his decision to start High School at NMMI. Being the hovering, attentive and over loving mother that i was, I was not sure i would make it through the first day of him being there. I watched him excitedly and curiously go from station to station as he gathered his necessities for his new future. I was tears from the moment we pulled into town. Thankfully the staff and students at NMMI helped to calm my fears... I will share a quick senario from that day...some things I didnt want to hear, but there is an end result i wouldnt comprehend until later in the year..... As i made my way teary eyed around campus, I came across a young man sitting in a chair, behind a desk through a window by the childrens dorm area. I guess i looked pretty upset because he immediatly asked if i was ok. I sniffled and wiped my eyes and asked, What do you think of NMMI? He started off with the fact that he had already done 4 years of high school there and was starting his first year of college. He stated that he really enjoyed his home at NMMI. I then asked how hard it was on him to be separated from his mom, dad and siblings. (My biggest fear was I wouldnt be there to protect him, nurture him and oversee his influences.) His response made my heart sink... He said, At first it was very hard. 21 days of no contact with the people you have seen every day since birth. I was scared after a week or so, homesick and physically exhausted from the new daily routines. I wanted to cry... I just wanted to go home... You make it through because of your NMMI family. Some are experiencing this for the first time along with you and the rest have already made it through and understand your position during this transition. Soon you have a family weekend and are elated to see family... Phone calls as often as possible... Christmas vacation you cant wait to go home. Then as time goes on, the phone calls become less and your bond with fellow cadets makes you want to spend weekends and Holidays with your NMMI brothers... visits become less, school work and activities take priority and NMMI......... becomes home. I burst into tears... mostly because of my own selfishness towards wanting my son to love and mold into what i believe a man should be... He was the eldest of 4. Smart, nurturing, respectful and MINE.... At orientation one of the first things brought up was.... Ok moms, I know your upset and absolutely convinced that no one can take care of your young man or woman as well as you, but you will see that your baby is going to be perfectly safe and cared for. Then we were told about no contact for 21 days... and then, about the mail we would receive. Mail as in, mothers WORST nightmare mail. They tell you they are not quite sure they made the right decision to go to school there. That they are hurting and just want to come home. Please mom, please come get me.... and as a mother, you will begin to read this and you will physically feel your heart strings rip from your chest... you will sob and want to go pick them up immediatly... All i can say is, Take a deep breath... do not respond right that second... and rationalize... Yes they are tired... Yes their bodies ache... are they in Danger???? NO! They are just not playing video games sitting on the couch and their brains are being challenged. They need someone to tell them that you are proud of their hard work. You understand they have had a horrible day, but tomorow is a new day. Lets just get through one day at a time. It will seem like months of horrible e-mails and calls... Hold strong and let them know you believe in them and are proud. The calls become less and less about wanting to come home and more upbeat about activities they are in and what was going to happen that upcoming weekend on campus... They become busy and interested in what is hapening in their lives and schedules. When you go to visit after about 4 or 5 months is when you see what the young man behind a desk told me the first day when i dropped my baby off. There is a bond, a brotherhood, a connection as strong as family. They rely on each other for moral, mental, physical and emotional support. Every one of those boys I met, told me how wonderful my son was and that they would often sit and talk about home. Instead of my son being embarassed to cry for his home, they openly talked about being there for each other during their ups and downs. My son introduced one of the boys that he Couldnt wait for me to meet and said in a normal unhushed voice, Momma, this is cadet _ _ _ _ _ _ _ . He sat with me every time i was missing you and we would talk...... My baby, was no longer my baby, but a young man... A young man who was surrounded by hundreds of other young men and women that has respect, compassion and pride in and for each other. It was then that i understood what that young man meant when he said, the calls will become less... NMMI family become FAMILY. I have to say that was the hardest year I have endured emotionally during my adventures as a mother.. i am proud to say my young man started at NMMI.
Posted on: Sat, 04 Oct 2014 22:26:50 +0000
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