#MessageAnonyme 052: #DepressionNotes Suicide is all i can think about these days, even though im totally aware its not even a viable option, my mind wouldnt let go of it, it sure seems appealing, the idea of an easy way out of this mess of hurt, pain and struggle, and for what? im not even sure i have a future, every single plan ive made to guarantee some kind of a future was a failure, i therefore feel utterly depressed (when was i ever not) to even try something new or do some effort to change the seemingly inevitable outcome, i cant study, i hate studies, ive reached the point when i cant even go out with friends, not because i dont have friends -of course there is that too- but simply due to my fear of human contact and social bonds, mainly because i hardly communicate; my fear fuels a certain awkwardness in my behaviour that itself feeds the fear back to grow further, its a vicious circle, and the only way to break it is to not be me, wich i surprinsingly tried to do, the only resault i came back with was an identity crisis.
Posted on: Sat, 15 Nov 2014 15:04:34 +0000
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