On the 6th of March, 1976 there was a funeral mass for my father James Quam. At the time my mom, Billie Quam was left to care for 10 children under the age of 18 by herself. She is a brave and remarkable woman and is now in the process of having a pacemaker installed to help her balance out the irregular up and down signals our bodies send out later in life. She is doing ok I am told and for this we are all grateful. Below is the eulogy I read at the mass for my dad...it is good to remember the ones who have such a big influence on our lives at the very early years of our lives...we forget sometimes with the day to day grind of life. ================ What is a Father? (Slightly updated thoughts I read and expressed as a Eulogy during the Funeral Mass in honor of my Dad on 6 March 1976.) This has been the topic of many speeches, talks, articles and even a few books. It is such a wide topic that has as many answers as there are husbands, wives, sons and daughters. At this time I would like to share with you just a little of my father. If I were to use one word to describe Dads approach to life it would be love. Everything he ever did and everything he ever said, was with this one word always in the back of his mind. Whether it was working two jobs, that he did most of the time I knew him or if it was helping to paint the church or school, he never complained. Oh, he could be upset and remark over a beer that the same 3 or 4 would be the only ones who would always show up, he never did complain about the type or quantity of work. He would always do the work joyfully. And why? Why did he work 2 jobs most of his life? Was it to provide himself with comforts and pleasures? NO! He did it all to make his family a little happier, a little bit more comfortable for the next birthday or Christmas. It was to see the joy on the face of Debbie, Susie or any of us kids when they would get a new pair of shoes or a new toy. But this display of love did not stop with his family, his love flowed out into his dealings with everyone he knew or came into contact with in life. If someone needed a job done and needed it done wholeheartedly who would they call on but Dad? You know it is at times like these that you think back and as I think back over all the things my Dad did, not only for me but for all my other 14 brothers and sisters were the lessons he taught us by his actions not always by his words. As the Bible says “Bring your children up in the ways thy should go and in your old age they will not disappoint you.” This is what he did in his way – he constantly taught us lessons of love by the actions of his life. Even though a good deal of the time, in our ignorance of life, which is youth, we would rebel and even downright revolt – he was always stronger and never gave in or gave up on us. These kinds of difficult life lessons unfortunately are the ones which you rarely realize until later. And sometimes time runs out before you can tell your Dad how valuable those early lessons of life really turned to be in reality. These are the thoughts that I want to leave with all of you who have come to share this day with us. My Dad was a father to all of us to the fullest extent possible. Today should not be a sad, sorrowful day but a joyful one. My Dad has given us so much and leaves us with so much. Today I am sure he is happy. I am also sure this is what he leaves with each of us today – happiness and love.
Posted on: Sun, 09 Mar 2014 12:14:39 +0000
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