Silent Confession Sanyukta and Randhir will represent FITE in the Innovations in Racing Car Engines Seminar to be held next month at National Institute of Technology Studies, Chandigarh (NITS), announced Vardhan Sir. Well none from the dream team was surprised. Everybody had very well expected this. They knew that they all were the support system of the engine that was being run by Sanyukta and Randhir, and they were happy with this set-up, because they had been on a winning spree ever since the dream team had been constituted. And everytime it was these two who had spear-headed the winning scheme. A lot had changed during the last three years for the Dream Team more so between Randhir and Sanyukta. For Vardhan Sir too it had been a gratifying journey because two of his best students had grown out of their constant cat fights and learnt to work in tandem to bring out the best in each other. He remembered how Randhir had transformed from being the nagging factor in Sanyuktas life to being her strongest pillar of support in last two years. Vardhan Sir had noticed time and again those passionate eyes that ogled at Sanyukta. He had tried cornering Randhir to convince him to express his compassion for Sanyukta to her, but Randhir had plainly denied. Sir, she loves her Engineering dream more than her own life. And we all know that. The least that I can do is to not distract her from her dream, he had reasoned. Vardhan Sir had always found their life to be a replica of his own life with Niharika while they were studying in the same college some 15 years back. One day both of you will realise that your presence cannot distract the other in any way. Rather you are the cementing factor for keeping each others passion intact. Instead there clearly have been instances in the past where you have been distracted due to the others absence, Vardhan Sir said to Randhir recalling the time when Sanyukta had left FITE temporarily for her alleged engagement to that idiot Sameer and Randhir had also wanted to leave the Dream Team. Coming back to present Vardhan Sir continued, Though it is only these two who are going to represent the team in the final competition, the entire dream team is to work on this project report. Parth is going to co-ordinate with all of you. And both of you, you need to be on your toes for the next one month because this is a competition with standards much higher than what you have faced till date. So you need to be thoroughly prepared. Randhir and Sanyukta shared a glance with each other and nodded in agreement. Yes Sir, we will give our best they both said at the same time. They both had grown up to be complementary to each other in every sense. She had always craved for acceptance while he continuously sought affection, and in each others company they felt complete. In solitude they felt vulnerable and often rushed back to being with each other mostly in the mechanical lab, or in the library because that way they could camouflage their need to be with each other, with their zeal to follow their passion and work together towards their goals. This understanding between the two of them had come the hard way, but that was history now. They still wondered regarding the exact nature of their relationship. Even though they felt strongly for each other, but amidst their fears and insecurities they constantly denied their own feelings. Initially it was ego that kept them at loggerheads with each other, but now it was shear fear that kept them from acknowledging the importance that they held in each others life. Neither wanted to risk the beautiful time, they were having chasing their dream together. The next one month was an extremely hectic one. The entire dream team had been working day in and day out for the upcoming seminar. The project report had been reviewed and re-reviewed under Vardhan Sirs guidance and looked like almost a flawless winner now. Good job guys! All of you have done a commendable job. Now the entire onus is on both of you Vardhan Sir said pointing towards Sanyukta and Randhir. They both agreed with him nervously and promised to do their best as the entire team dispersed. I suggest that you two leave tonight so that you reach there by dawn. This ways you will have atleast 3-4 hours to relax and gear up for the competition. Vardhan said observing that there was more to Randhirs nervousness than just the competition. His restlessness was quite evident from the way he kept looking at Sanyukta and then away from her. When he realised that Vardhan Sir was observing him, he started looking around as if searching for something. What you are looking for Randhir, is not anywhere outside. It is within you, you have to acknowledge it and let it out thought Vardhan Sir and said to Randhir, Keep your focus. Remember that our institutes prestige is in your hands. I promise, I will Sir, Randhir replied, with the determination and focus back on his face and mind. Sanyukta was extremely nervous about the competition at NITS. Like many other competitions it was yet another opportunity for her to make her mark in this mans world of mechanical engineering. But, atleast she did not have to fight the in-house battles now - the ones with her family who had finally conceded to her dream of completing her engineering and only then talk about her marriage. And those with Randhir, who had constantly made efforts to shove her out of FITE during the first 2 years of their engineering. It was when she was about to leave FITE for her engagement and marriage after the 2nd year, that something had changed. Yes she had noticed, she had noticed how Randhir had started acting weird. He was suddenly protective about her, or to be more precise, possessive about her. She had noticed how Randhir had leashed back at the LITS boys for making fun of her and trying to humiliate her. But...but but but, only if she could tell him that she is getting it, but cannot acknowledge it, never. In her struggle to pursue mechanical engineering she had put so much at stake that she was determined to not let anything distract her. She did help her friends with their personal problems, mediated to resolve conflicts in the Dream Team, stood by Randhir in his times of personal crunch when his parents were going through a divorce. But she could not get into the complications of a relationship. Not at this juncture, when she had fought it all and was about to achieve her goal of becoming the best performing Topper of the Mechanical Engineering Department at FITE. But Sanyukta was little aware of the fact that matters of the heart cannot be determined and directed. Lately, she often found herself thinking about Randhir, trying to justify to herself the cold behaviour she rendered out to him and the self-imposed reasons for not acknowledging how important he had become for her. Whenever Randhir gave her those looks filled with care, passion and desire, she hated herself for looking through his eyes. She detested pretending as if she hasnt read them, that she cant understand what those orbs full of passion for her were trying to shout out loud. She loathed herself for being in this situation, Constraints, why is it that so many constraints rule my life? First I had to fight for my dream with my own Family and now my emotions for him. Will anything ever come easily to me? Sanyukta thought as she packed her bag to leave for the competition. She was nervous because she would be spending 3 days alone with Randhir. There would be no one familiar to act as an alibi, a reason for her to be away from him. She was going to spend 3 full days with him almost all alone. What if she lost control over herself, what if her mental shield got shattered by her emotional charge? No, Sanyu you cant let this happen. You are strong enough to shield your emotions and be focused on your goal. You have to do this for yourself, for Vardhan Sir and for your mother. And you will do it. She resolved to herself. He was already waiting in the cab when she reached the college compound. When will you learn to be on time Farzi? Randhir said as he rushed to put her luggage in the cabs rear. What are you carrying? We are going just for 3 days. he said as he lifted the trolley bag with great difficulty. Its my tool kit. Just incase if they ask us to work on some proto-type or something? She replied as she got into the cab. In that case Miss Sanyukta Agarwal they will also provide us with the tool kit, Randhir said as he signalled the driver to start. But I want to carry my lucky tool kit along with me, do you have a problem? Sanyukta replied back with her eyes warning Randhir that he better not have a problem. Randhir just passed a you are impossible look to her and checked on the directions to the inter-state bus terminal with the driver. It was early November, and the nights had become chilly. Sanyukta pulled out a shawl out of her handbag and wrapped it around herself. Oh dam!!! I forgot to pick up jacket Randhir exclaimed just as he saw Sanyuktas shawl. See it is the devils who work in hurry. What will you do know? Sanyukta asked with genuine concern. Will buy one in Chandigarh tomorrow post the first round is over Randhir replied in a matter-of-fact tone. At the bus stand, they board the Volvo and took their seats once their luggage was settled. Sanyukta immediately opened up her laptop to revise as she explained to Randhir Though we havnt left anything to chance but revising once more will not do any harm. Oh please Sanyukta! Mediocres need such revisions, not geniuses like Randhir Singh Shekhawat Randhir replied in his Mr. Perfect style. It was Sanyuktas turn to return the you are impossible look now. For the next hour or so they discussed their subject matter all over again to figure out any anomalies or loopholes which they could discuss with their team and their mentor early morning tomorrow before the competition. Then Sanyukta shut her laptop yawning. I guess we should have some sleep now, we need to be sober tomorrow morning she said as she pulled up her shawl. The AC in the Volvo was quite chilling, repetitive request to the attendant to lower the cooling had gone unheard. Other passengers like it this ways is what he had said. Sanyukta observed that Randhir was feeling extremely cold as he rubbed his arms fervently to warm himself up. Sanyukta thought for a second and extended her shawl to him. He looked at her raising his eye brows, as if questioning what she meant to do. Its ok. Its a big shawl and im sure we can manage with it for the time being. Ofcourse if you dont have a problem and, if you dont wish to reach Chandigarh in a frozen state. Sanyukta said non-chalantly. Randhir accepted the favour with equal nonchalance. Jerk ! This MCP couldnt have said a plain thank you. she thought. Thank you GOD! he thought smiling in his mind, how I want to be this close to her. Always. He was too thrilled to fall asleep given the proximity between both of them. He suddenly felt her head on his shoulder. He shuddered for once, but then moved a bit to help her settle in comfortably on his shoulder and arm. He poked his head forward and looked at her sideways to make sure that she was asleep and then went back resting his head on hers. With a swift movement he took her hand that was leaning against his arm, held it softly and thought in his mind, I do not ever want to leave you Sanyukta. I promise Ill be there for you through thick and thin. Almost as if in a telepathic reaction, Sanyukta turned around still pretending to be deep in sleep, swung-in her other hand to hold his arm and tightened her grip on his palm that was holding hers. I know Randhir what you mean, and I too pray for us to be around each other. Always. Somehow. She thought to herself before finally dozing off to sleep. And each found solace and peace within, in this silent confession made for the one they wanted to be with, forever.
Posted on: Wed, 03 Dec 2014 12:54:43 +0000
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