So, I received a card from my mother today (yesterday). I am not sure what response is expected from me, or what sort of reaction she was seeking to enact from me in composing this literature. For my mother’s final words to me, on March 4, 2013, were “may I never have to be in your presence again for the rest of my days here. You are NOTHING to me”. No questions about how she feels or felt here; thoughts were crystal clear -- door was shut, nailed, cemented and the bridge was blown the (BLEEP) up! In that moment, Jade L decreased her children from 3 to 2 containing one daughter, one son and several grand and great grand children. The End!!!! I endured therapy, analyzed the attack on my psyche by the actions of this sister, her husband, the brother, the aunt, the grandmother, the mother, the rejection, the obvious and intentional lack of respect, (taking a breath here) I released, I accepted and finally, I moved on, all while staying silent (for the most part) about these issues and choosing never again to compromise my dignity and being to false relations. I have, what I termed, a clinical detachment. I don’t discuss them, I feel no connection to them, I don’t trust them…etc. etc. and so, as there is no relationship with them, I don’t talk to them. I have no regrets. So, why am I the recipient of a card 4 years later filled with …….misfired content? Truly, it is not like I did not understand Jade true feelings towards me the FIRST time… (REALLY, now Ive got to be rejected AND DUMB?? BRUH!) I will not assume responsibility for anyone else’s actions, the subsequent consequences of their actions; nor the delivery of Jade’s false projections on my doorsteps. I won’t. But their actions are their actions, and the consequences are the consequences that they each have to deal with them. Not my monkey, not my show. Their relationships were not destroyed in a blink of an eye. They were destroyed with intentional and determined disrespect and inconsideration and willful dismissal on a long-termed basis. They were destroyed with purposeful lies and attacks on my character to justify the actions and behaviors of those telling such falsehoods. They were destroyed by statements made, such as the ones above, and the supporting actions of lack of communication and subsequent demonstrations of lack of loving-kindness towards me and my son, all while avoiding accountability for such coldness. I do not know the purpose for the card, nor do I know what response you were seeking to gain, Jade Lauryne, but your message, again, remains loud and clear and there was no need for the cards. Your “closure” has been evident and obvious in your actions and behaviors and could be no clearer. Your “death” was never a thought or consideration, and I am at peace with yours and all others intended absences. Blessed Be.
Posted on: Fri, 12 Dec 2014 09:18:38 +0000