So this happened 18 years ago today. The doctor handed me a tiny little baby girl, a special little girl, who according to the doctors predictions, at best would be a vegetable at worst wouldnt live very long. I wont lie. I cried...a lot. I spent many a nights wondering why me? Why us? We were young. We were healthy. We had no family history. The chances were like one in 100 million. I now realize that we won the lotto. Hit the jackpot.I no longer wonder why me, why us. I now know that everything happens for a reason... whatever your beliefs...Gods will, the stars and planets lining up...Emma chose us to be her parents, to nourish her, to love her, to help her reach her full potential, to prove the doctors wrong. Not because were great or wonderful or because we were the best choice. No. Because I, we, had something to learn... and Emma was here to teach us. Im still learning. We are all a work in progress. It took me many years to get to this point and it was not an easy smooth journey. No. I fought it...I was weak, selfish. I felt sorry for myself. Emma spent the first five months of her life in a hospital...in intensive care, being monitored, tested, operated on. And then we gave her up. And we took her back. Unlike most people who make this difficult decision, we were of the few fortunate ones, who got a second chance. I have not forgiven myself for the 5 months I lost with Emma, for her returning to us sicker than when we gave her up...on oxygen. I have spent every day since her return, asking for her forgiveness, for my weakness, my selfishness. And I will spend the rest of my life, trying to make it up to her. Among the things that Emma has taught me, us, over the years is that life is precious. Life is fragile. Life is beautiful. Happy 18th birthday baby girl. Ill keep learning...as long as youll keep teaching. ♥
Posted on: Tue, 08 Apr 2014 17:21:17 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015