So we didnt go to Sydney...... We are still here at Canberra Hospital. This morning involved many phone calls, conversations and much going round in circles trying to work out what the plans for Hs care would be. It was finally decided about 3pm we would be moved back to Westmead to the Orthopaedic ward; but there wasnt a bed available for us today. I tried all day to speak with Dr Stalley myself. Finally I had a conversation with the man himself I think sometime after 3pm. He was completely confident he would be able to sort Hs break out, his words Mrs Morton, its just what I do..... But..... he wont do anything until Hs counts recover from chemo which is most likely early next week. (I did remind him that he has a 4 month old puppy named after him....) BIG HUGE MASSIVE SIGH. Haise is comfortable and not in pain. The reality is we face being in hospital for Ethans birthday and Christmas. Phill and I have everything crossed that H will be stable enough to be transferred back here to Canberra Hospital when he has had time to recover from the surgery. If we have to be in hospital Canberra is highly preferable. Today has been one sad day. I think I could have filled Lake Burley Griffin with tears had it been empty. I am sad for my beautiful boy, sad for my beautiful Ab and Ethan, sad for Phill, Im just sad. Why on earth these things happen is beyond me. Ethan said to me tonight Mum, its not a cancer thing so we are all ok, its just a snap, just picture some celery snapping, thats what we are dealing with....... excuse me Mr wise near 8 year old....... Harrisons thinking is we are dealing with a scaffolding issue. I so love my boys wisdom and humour. Abby is just blown away by how tough her brother is. She has been really worried all day how he has managed a broken leg and not told anyone it was hurting. She thinks he is super tough and had more than his fair share of trouble. I agree wholeheartedly. I dont know what else to say. There are people who are doing it tougher than us. I know this. But I have to say this is really hard. This is not fair. Haise is an amazing boy who continues to astound us with his resilience and positivity. However as his Mum my heart continues to be broken. I hope tomorrow is better for all of us. I hope my sadness eases into an emotion that is not as intense, more manageable, something that I know is sitting just there, under the surface but I can still function and find humour and reassurance. Phill and I are overwhelmed by our amazing support crew, near and far. Your strength, encouragement and support truly gives us the energy to keep on. My eyes are tired. My Dear and Beautiful Friend Karen summed up why my eyes feel so tired all the time - because its forceful and hard crying. She is so right, its forceful and to an outsider I am sure quite impressive! I can certainly cry with a force. I spoke with Luce this evening, bless that man. Here is an oncologist who was talking to be at midnight, 630am and several times during the day. When I answered the phone tonight I was crying..... he said Emma, dont do that you know for a one hour meltdown it takes 10 hours to put yourself back together! He made me laugh because he is so right. Therefore by my calculations I will be putting myself back together for many, many days to come. Much love, Em xx
Posted on: Tue, 02 Dec 2014 11:12:35 +0000
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