Some funny one-liner jokes of my collection :D Whenever someone asks me to recommend a movie, I suddenly forget every movie ever made. My study period = 15 minutes. My break time = 3 hours. Making unnecessary sounds when you are bored. I open a text and mentally respond then forget to actually respond. I hope karma slaps you in the face before I do. Why is that cotton candy talking? Grandma, thats Nicki Minaj. People say everything happens for a reason. So when I punch you in the face, remember I have a reason. The One Who Laughs Last Is The Slowest. The One Who Laughs First Has The Dirtiest Mind. Open Books, Not Legs. Blow Minds, Not Guys. I Keep Seeing All These Summer Bucket Lists With All This Exciting Stuff. Meanwhile, Mine Is Just Like, Find A Shortcut To The Fridge. If My Mom Cant Find It, Nobody Can Find It. Best Gamer Pick Up Line: You Turn My Software Into Hardware. Friends are like boobs, some are big, some are small, some are real and some are fake. I Saw A Sign That Almost Made Me Piss Myself. It Said, Bathrooms Closed! I Have Good News And Bad News To Tell You. The Bad News? I Have No Good News. And The Good News? I Have No Bad News. Do You Want To Go Out With Me? (A) Yes (B) A (C) B. Once Upon A Time I Smashed My Face Into My Keyboard And Accidentally Wrote The 5th Twilight Book. Imagine Having A Teacher Named Alejandro, And Whenever He Calls On You, Just Be Like, Dont Call My Name, Dont Call My Name, Alejandro. F.E.A.R = Face Everything And Recover Or Forget Everything And Run! Im A Type Of Person Who Laughs At A Joke 3 Times. 1st When Its Told, 2nd When Its Explained To Me, And 3rd When I Finally Get It! You Dont Know Something? Google It. You Dont Know Someone? Facebook It. You Cant Find Something? Mom! I Hate It When I Have So Many Tabs Open, And One Of Them Starts Playing A Talking Ad That I Cant Find It. I Like Your Makeup. Just Kidding. It Looks Like You Got Gangbanged By Crayola. THE BIGGEST LIE EVER TOLD; Was When The Doctor Walked In To Mrs. Biebers Hospital Room And Said, Congratulations, Its A Boy Dear Optimist, Pessimist, And Realist. While You Guys Were Arguing About The Cup Of Water. I Drank It. - The Opportunist 3 Things That Should Never Be Broken; (1) A Heart (2) A Promise And (3) A Condom :D :D #madman
Posted on: Sat, 19 Oct 2013 08:05:20 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015