Some of the biggest lies society taught me: - I have to prove to men that Im desirable. - Its my responsibility to make men happy. - Its my job to make a man feel like a man. - If a man tells me that Im a breath of fresh air, that Im his safe haven, or that Im not like any other woman, this means Ive won a fabulous reward. Im learning that in order to have healthy interactions with men: A. I have to know that Im desirable & worthy of healthy attention, with or without someones approval. B. Just like I create my own happiness, I need to understand that its bullshit to take on the responsibility of making a man happy. He should already own his own happiness, & Im a cherry on top that can add to his joy........ B2. IF I EVEN LIKE HIM LIKE THAT. My focus should be on whether this is someone I like enough to be his cherry.... not on trying to show him that Im an excellent cherry. C. I shouldnt need to validate a mans manhood. If he doesnt believe in his own manhood, there will be big problems with me trying to make him feel secure. Instead, I should honor his manhood & support him to grow more & more into the man he wants to be...not the man I think men should be. If he isnt the type of man I like, that isnt justification to fix him. It just means he can be in the friend zone & only the friend zone. D. I cant think someone has done me a favor by expressing how I impact them. I can thank them for sharing their thoughts with me. But they didnt reward me.... since being authentically me is its own reward. Plus, I cant get caught up in the game of comparing myself to other women, in a good or bad light. E. If ever in doubt, refer to B2.
Posted on: Sat, 02 Aug 2014 23:55:07 +0000
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