Sometimes I parent like a BOSS. And sometimes Im trying to get the preschooler ready for his bath, so I take his diaper off (because he still wears diapers - but thats a post for another day) and hes taken such a *copious dump* that as Im trying to shake the load into the toilet (because Im trying to demonstrate that the toilet - not the diaper - should be the final destination of *any* human waste product) parts of it fling off onto the bathroom floor, and in my house that sh*t gets Cloroxed up PRONTO, and as Im cleaning and hoisting preschooler into the bath, baby brother crawls in and proceeds to faceplant on the floor because *hes* only wearing a diaper and chubby baby knees plus Clorox equals *zero* traction, and so I repeatedly pick him up and put him out on the carpet so I can dry the bathroom floor, but 11-month-olds are *ruthlessly* determined and preschooler is *not* helping because hes now splashing water on the floor (endlessly amused at the hijinks) so after the third time of baby crawling into the bathroom I finally shut the bathroom door for justonefrickingsecond and then he goes totally apesh*t crying and banging on the door. Motherhood. Sissies need not apply.
Posted on: Fri, 26 Sep 2014 18:35:28 +0000
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