The Kitty Cats Cometh By E. T. Brother Copyright 2014 by E. T. Brother The story that Im about to tell you began about a week after the evil bunny rabbits had been defeated. I was on a much needed vacation, the weather had turned cold in Virginia, so I was down in the Bahamas. I was siting in a lounge chair at the beach, sipping a Pina Colada, the real kind not the virgin kind, trying to recharge my batteries. The preparation and battles with the turkeys and bunnies had left me drained. I was watching the water lap up on the beach, when the alarm on my computer went off. I put my drink down and grabbed my computer, which was right beside me on a table. I began punching codes into the keyboard. What came up on the screen sent cold chills through me, gave me goose bumps, and made the hair on my arms and the back of my next stand up. I covered my mouth to stifle a scream, then realized it was just my screen saver, it was a picture of me. I moved the mouse and the picture went away. I punched in codes on the keyboard and the picture that came up wasn`t near as scary, it was a roomful of cute, cuddly kitty cats. I turned the volume up, and what I heard got my heart racing. The reason the turkeys and rabbits failed was because of that fellow named E. T. Brother. We take him out, and we can take over the world without a problem. He is down in the Bahamas right now, sitting at the beach drinking Pina Coladas. I have sent ten assassin kitty cats to take care of E. T. once and for all. The assassin cats look cute and cuddly, so they will be able to get in close. The assassins are cold blooded killers though. They will take him out of the equation shortly. The kitty cat in front of the room said. The cat looked down at his watch. The assassins should be beginning their attack in two minutes. Jack turn the monitor on so we can watch. The cat said. I shut the laptop, picked it up, and jumped to my feet. I began to run up the beach toward where my car was. I knew there was no time to go to my room for anything. A kitty cat jumped out of hiding, as I got close to the parking lot. The kitty cat raised a small handgun, and it had a smirk on its furry face. Where do you think you are going E. T.? This is the end of the line for you. The Kitty said. I kicked the kitty cat, the gun went off, the bullet flew by my ear, I felt the air from the bullet, as it went by. I kicked the kitty cat again, it went flying backwards with a hiss, and landed on its back. The gun flew from its furry paw. I began to run toward the car. I looked up, and saw a kitty cat jumping off a tree branch toward me, with its claws out. I swung my laptop at it, hit the kitty cat, and it fell to the ground. The cat let out a loud meow of surprise, as it hit the ground. It did not land on its feet, it landed on its back with a thud. I began to run toward the parking lot again, and tripped over a hidden wire. I put my hands out, dropped my laptop, and landed on my hands and knees. A kitty cat came out of the bushes, it was holding a small handgun. It`s over E. T., you ought to stop running because we are going to get you. The kitty cat said. I let the kitty cat get close, then I backhanded it. The kitty cat went flying backwards, it hissed then landed in a heap. The gun went flying out of its paw and landed in the bushes. The handgun went off and the bullet hit a branch in a tree to my right. The branch cracked and broke. I heard a surprised meow and I looked up. The branch and a kitty cat fell from the tree. The kitty cat landed in a heap and let out a screaming meow of pain. I looked at my laptop and saw it was broken. I jumped to my feet and began to run toward the parking lot. I heard a yelling meow behind me and looked over my shoulder. The remaining six kitty cats were running after me. They were all carrying small handguns. I looked around and saw a big branch lying next to the path. I grabbed it, turned around, and swung it at the kitty cats. I hit the kitty cats and bowled them over like bowling pins. They all hissed and fired at me. The bullets flew passed my head on the right and left sounding like angry hornets, but they all missed me. The cats landed in a heap, on top of one another, and their guns went flying out of their paws. The guns landed about ten feet away with a thud. I turned around, threw the branch down, and ran to the car. I pulled my keys out of my pocket and unlocked the door. I got in, looked around, and didn`t see any kitty cats around. I shut the door and put the key in the ignition. I turned the key on and the tape player turned on. If you are listening to this, then it means you will be dead in seconds. Prepare to meet your maker E. T. Brother. Goodbye. I heard. I opened the door, jumped out, and began to run. The car exploded behind me. The explosion lifted me off my feet and threw me forward. Flaming debris flew past me, as I flew through the air. I landed on the ground, in a ditch, and put my hands over my head. If I could have bent over and kissed myself, where the air quality is questionable, I would have. Flaming debris landed all around me. One piece of flaming debris landed on my back. I felt the heat from the flames and my shirt started to burn. I rolled over onto my back, then I rolled over a few times, to put the fire out. When the debris stopped falling, I sat up, and looked around. The ten kitty cats were standing at the edge of the parking lot looking at the remains of my car. They were all smiling and giving each other high fives. I realized that they had not seen me escape. I smiled and began to crawl away. I got to the top of a gully and began to crawl down into it. When I was sure I was out of sight of the parking lot, I stood up and walked away. I knew the kitty cats were planning on taking over the world, I didn`t know how they were going to do it, but I knew they were serious. I had to get somewhere safe, so I could prepare for them. I knew it would do no good to go to the proper authorities, because they would threaten to put me in the loony bin, so I would just be wasting my time. I made it to the other side of the island and chartered a plane. I had to get back to Virginia, so I could get to my underground bunker. We flew out of the Bahamas and I made my way back to Virginia. Once I made it back to Virginia, I drove to the bunker. I walked in and shut the bomb doors. I walked over to my work station and turned on all the monitors. I brought up the cameras, in the kitty cats hideout, and began to watch. Now that E. T. Brother has been taken care of, we can get on with our plans to take over the world. It is time for the cats to rule. The humans have had dominion over us long enough, but that will soon come to an end. The cats are the rightful rulers of the world, when we implement our plans, then we will be the rulers of the world. The turkeys and rabbits had it right on how to accomplish it, they had mind controlling devices, but they failed because of E. T. Brother. We have eliminated that threat, so we will not have any problems. Make final preparations, I want to take over the world in three days. We wont have a problem, since E. T. Brother has been removed from the equation. Let me know when final preparations are complete. The kitty cats leader said. I turned the sound off on the computer, and began to make plans to stop the kitty cats. I knew they would be striking in three days, so I didn`t have a moment to waste. The first thing I did, was go take a nap. I was tired, and I was technically still on my vacation for another hour. After I woke up from the nap, I began to get ready for the kitty cats. I observed them for the rest of the day, as I was making my plans, and I found out they were going to use mind control as well. I made plans and built machines, getting ready for the kitty cats plans to take over the world. The day that the kitty cats planned to take over the world arrived, I wasnt quite ready for the cats. I was wearing my contraption on my head, to block the kitty cats mind control machines, when the alarms began to go off. I rushed over to the computer and punched codes into the keyboard. I discovered the kitty cats had turned on their mind control machines and they were beginning to move from their hideouts. I cursed silently, because I was not quite ready for them, I needed about another hour. Yes, I know I would have been able to get it done, if I had not taken that nap, but it was my vacation. I know the fate of the world was depending on me to stop the kitty cats, but hello, it was my vacation, don`t tell me you wouldn`t have done the same thing. I rushed over to the mind control disruption machine. I began to work furiously on it, and was able to rig it up in about 15 minutes, so it would work. I flipped the switch on, to turn it on, and everything in the bunker shut down. The emergency lights came on. I began to curse out loud, using some very colorful words, to say the least, and making some words up on the spot. A sailor wouldn`t have blushed, but Im sure most everyone else might have. I flipped the switch off, went to the breaker box, opened it, and found that I had knocked off a breaker. I reset the breaker and everything came back on in the bunker. I walked back to the disruption machine, checked it, and found it had a blown fuse. I grabbed my last fuse and put it into the machine. I flipped the switch and everything turned off in the bunker. The emergency lights came on. I began to curse, in earnest now, because I had used the last fuse, so I was going to have to go out and buy a pack. I flipped the switch off, went to the breaker box, and reset the breaker. I walked back to the machine, checked it, and found that I had crossed two of the wires. I fixed the wires, then I made my way out of the bunker. I should have taken the time to fix the disruption machine right the first time, but I was trying to stop the kitty cats evil plans. Don`t tell me that I could have done it right the first time, if I hadn`t taken that nap. We have already discussed this, I was on vacation. I got to my car, got in, and drove to town. I saw some very disturbing things as I drove. The worst thing that I saw, was a naked fat guy walking down the road, that image will give me nightmares for years to come, Im sure. I saw mindless zombies stumbling all about, one walked in front of me, and I had to slam on the brakes. I blew the horn, but the mindless zombie never even looked my way. I made my way to the store, got out of the car, and walked in. The store was deserted. I went back to where the fuse were, grabbed two packs of fuses, and walked to the counter. I pulled out five dollars and put it on the counter. I could have walked out without paying, but I felt that would have defeated the purpose. With me trying to save the world and all that, then stealing two packs of fuses, it just wouldn`t have been right. I rushed out to my car, got in, and drove back to the bunker. Fortunately I didn`t see that naked fat guy again, I shiver thinking about that, I believe it has scarred me for life. I can deal with evil kitty cats but I draw the line at having to look at that again. I got back to the bunker and went in. I shut the door and rushed over to the disruption machine, opened up a pack of fuses, and put a new fuse in. I flipped the switch, the mind control disruption machine came on, and it began to block the kitty cats mind control machines. My machine then began to broadcast what the kitty cats had done. I ran over to the work station and began to punch in codes. Kitty cat search and capture machines began to lift off around the world and they began to capture the kitty cats. One of the kitty cat search and capture machines flew to the kitty cats leaders hideout and captured all the leaders of the cat revolt. Within a few hours, the majority of the kitty cats had been captured. The rest of the kitty cats were captured by the end of the day. The rightful leaders took back over and earth was saved. Mankind resumed living their normal lives. Fortunately, the fat guy put some clothes on, that was a big relief. It was scary enough seeing him with clothes on. Im sure that I will have nightmare about that fat guy. Earth was saved, so I went back to the Bahamas. The End
Posted on: Sun, 19 Oct 2014 15:34:31 +0000
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