There seems to be a growing movement to encourage introverts to embrace their inner solitude, eschew social norms, and not feel obligated to engage in any social activity theyre not comfortable with. While Ill be the first person to jump on the Be yourself bandwagon, I think this trend is harmful and a recent scientific study backs me up. If you refuse to engage socially with other people its your own loss, but at the same time youre being lied to by the people around you. Small talk might not come easily, and talking to strangers might be frightening, but just because its uncomfortable doesnt mean you shouldnt do it. Youve been told that if something makes you uncomfortable thats because its not in your personality type and is, in fact, the domain of the outgoing, popular extroverts but this is far from the truth. This article (and the NYTimes one it links to) demonstrates what I have always held to be true--if you step outside your comfort zone and engage with the people around you it will make you happier, and more confident. This doesnt mean that everyone has to start going out and partying every night. Some people need their space and solitude and thats completely understandable. But that doesnt mean its the best thing, or even the right thing to hang your head, mumble, or refuse to say hello to a friendly stranger, acquaintance, or grocery store clerk. Im not at all advocating giving into the pressures of todays world to fit into a cookie cutter--heaven knows I dont do that at all, although in a slightly different way. But stop believing that small talk is evil and that we would all be better off if we wore masks in public so no one would have to interact with anyone else. Youre depriving yourself of your humanity. artofmanliness/2014/06/04/how-to-make-small-talk-with-strangers-my-21-day-happiness-experiment/
Posted on: Thu, 05 Jun 2014 15:54:00 +0000