Things NOT to do or say to a Homeschooler. I thought this was pretty funny because a lot of these happen to us. 1 Please stop asking us if its legal. If it is — and it is — its insulting to imply that were criminals. And if we were criminals, would we admit it? 2 Learn what the words socialize and socialization mean, and use the one you really mean instead of mixing them up the way you do now. Socializing means hanging out with other people for fun. Socialization means having acquired the skills necessary to do so successfully and pleasantly. If youre talking to me and my kids, that means that we do in fact go outside now and then to visit the other human beings on the planet, and you can safely assume that weve got a decent grasp of both concepts. 3 Quit interrupting my kid at her dance lesson, scout meeting, choir practice, baseball game, art class, field trip, park day, music class, 4H club, or soccer lesson to ask her if as a homeschooler she ever gets to socialize. 4 Dont assume that every homeschooler you meet is homeschooling for the same reasons and in the same way as that one homeschooler you know. 5 If that homeschooler you know is actually someone you saw on TV, either on the news or on a reality show, the above goes double. 6 Please stop telling us horror stories about the homeschoolers you know, know of, or think you might know who ruined their lives by homeschooling. Youre probably the same little bluebird of happiness whose hobby is running up to pregnant women and inducing premature labor by telling them every ghastly birth story youve ever heard. We all hate you, so please go away. 7 We dont look horrified and start quizzing your kids when we hear theyre in public school. Please stop drilling our children like potential oil fields to see if were doing what you consider an adequate job of homeschooling. 8 Stop assuming all homeschoolers are religious. 9 Stop assuming that if were religious, we must be homeschooling for religious reasons. 10 We didnt go through all the reading, learning, thinking, weighing of options, experimenting, and worrying that goes into homeschooling just to annoy you. Really. This was a deeply personal decision, tailored to the specifics of our family. Stop taking the bare fact of our being homeschoolers as either an affront or a judgment about your own educational decisions. 11 Please stop questioning my competency and demanding to see my credentials. I didnt have to complete a course in catering to successfully cook dinner for my family; I dont need a degree in teaching to educate my children. If spending at least twelve years in the kind of chew-it-up-and-spit-it-out educational facility we call public school left me with so little information in my memory banks that I cant teach the basics of an elementary education to my nearest and dearest, maybe theres a reason Im so reluctant to send my child to school. 12 If my kids only six and you ask me with a straight face how I can possibly teach him what hed learn in school, please understand that youre calling me an idiot. Dont act shocked if I decide to respond in kind. 13 Stop assuming that because the word home is right there in homeschool, we never leave the house. Were the ones who go to the amusement parks, museums, and zoos in the middle of the week and in the off-season and laugh at you because you have to go on weekends and holidays when its crowded and icky. 14 Stop assuming that because the word school is right there in homeschool, we must sit around at a desk for six or eight hours every day, just like your kid does. Even if were into the school side of education — and many of us prefer a more organic approach — we can burn through a lot of material a lot more efficiently, because we dont have to gear our lessons to the lowest common denominator. 15 Stop asking, But what about the Prom? Even if the idea that my kid might not be able to indulge in a night of over-hyped, over-priced revelry was enough to break my heart, plenty of kids who do go to school dont get to go to the Prom. For all you know, Im one of them. I might still be bitter about it. So go be shallow somewhere else. 16 Dont ask my kid if she wouldnt rather go to school unless you dont mind if I ask your kid if he wouldnt rather stay home and get some sleep now and then. 17 Stop saying, Oh, I could never homeschool! Even if you think its some kind of compliment, it sounds more like youre horrified. One of these days, I wont bother disagreeing with you any more. 18 If you can remember anything from chemistry or calculus class, youre allowed to ask how well teach these subjects to our kids. If you cant, thank you for the reassurance that we couldnt possibly do a worse job than your teachers did, and might even do a better one. 19 Stop asking about how hard it must be to be my childs teacher as well as her parent. I dont see much difference between bossing my kid around academically and bossing him around the way I do about everything else. 20 Stop saying that my kid is shy, outgoing, aggressive, anxious, quiet, boisterous, argumentative, pouty, fidgety, chatty, whiny, or loud because hes homeschooled. Its not fair that all the kids who go to school can be as annoying as they want to without being branded as representative of anything but childhood. 21 Quit assuming that my kid must be some kind of prodigy because shes homeschooled. 22 Quit assuming that I must be some kind of prodigy because I homeschool my kids. 23 Quit assuming that I must be some kind of saint because I homeschool my kids. 24 Stop talking about all the great childhood memories my kids wont get because they dont go to school, unless you want me to start asking about all the not-so-great childhood memories you have because you went to school. 25 Heres a thought: If you cant say something nice about homeschooling, shush up!
Posted on: Tue, 09 Sep 2014 19:10:23 +0000
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