You know there seems to be a misconception that Im not a Christian. Im not sure who gets to say who is and who is not a Christian here on this earth. Just because I make mistakes and my past is a little more grey than other peoples doesnt mean that I havent taken God into my heart and accepted him as my savior, because I have. When my son was in a bad bicycle accident and I had to watch him be strapped down and life flighted to Charleston and then watch him lay there on a vent thats when I needed God and thats when I cried out to him and thats when he answered me. As I was watching my son lay there not knowing what was going to happen to him, i was willing to do anything at all to ensure that he was going to be ok. I could have called out to anybody but I knew in my heart that there was only one person, one being who could help him and that was God. Because I was helpless I was completely helpless, there was nothing that I could do for him and I didnt like that feeling at all. So now I just hand it to God, he has these great big wonderful hands and they can hold anything I give him. Theres nothing he cant take from me and I love him because he does that for me. There are some people who want to say bad things about me because of choices that I made and thats okay, thats their issue not mine. I know what God has placed on my heart and I know what he has said to me very clearly, he said I love you no matter what and those who judge you will be judged and I know God hates sin and I know that we each fail and everyone of us sins daily. Every day our walk with God is altered by something that we do and at the end of the day we have to reach out and we have to say Im sorry, we have to say Im weak and Im unable to do this on my own. When I was watching Jonathan lay there on that gurney and then lay there in the hospital I didnt know if he was going to be coming out of that or if it was going to be one of the hardest things that Id ever have to face. God tells us to have faith, have faith in Him and His mercy and His grace. Have faith that even though we dont deserve it He loves us anyway. I dont believe God makes mistakes, I believe that when He had to turn away from his child on that cross for us that He knew true unimaginable pain. Which of us would sacrifice our child for mankind?? Not me...Im not that strong. Im just so grateful that He was that strong. Anyways thats the end of what I felt needed to be said. I pray that when people see me they dont just see the outside, I pray they see my heart the way Christ does.
Posted on: Sat, 04 Oct 2014 00:44:23 +0000